Financial Horror Stories: Joel
With Halloween as my inspiration this month, I’m sharing with you the theme of Financial Horror Stories. I want to be clear that we’re utilizing this titling in a very tongue-in-cheek manner. First of all, I don’t think any financial story is of the horror variety, but I’ve worked with clients long enough to know that after a string of unfortunate financial occurrences, it’s quite easy to feel as though you’re starring in your very own Financial Horror Movie. This month I’m going to share with you some of those stories where our clients have felt as though they were in some scary situations and how they worked their way out of them. Joining me today is Joel. He is going to share how his life changed with a break-up, and the twists and turns it took from there.
What Are We drinking?
Joel - Coffee with pumpkin spice creamer
Shannon - Black Cherry Schweppes
Podcast Notes
A lot of folks feel like their financial journey is a horror story. There can be feelings of shame and heaviness tied to the numbers and Trainers at The Financial Gym see it all the time. Letting go of the shame and fear around finance is a huge mission of The Gym, and what inspired this month’s podcast theme.
A few years ago Joel was working a job in the Flatiron district, pretty close to The Financial Gym HQ. The Fin Gym team waltzed into his office and invited them to the space for an event. Shannon reveals this was called ‘The Hello Neighbor’ campaign.
His company brought The Financial Gym into their space for a Wellness Week Event at the office. He introduced The Gym to his next employer as well.
At the end of 2019, Joel and his husband legally separated. When that happened, he decided to get in touch with The Gym because he was going to be adulting on his own. The divorce was a blindside for him at first, but he didn’t want this to slow his goals.
Joel took on the debt accumulated through the marriage, and Shannon shares that she did the same when she got divorced.
When the pandemic hit, Joel was furloughed and ultimately laid off from his job. It was a lot all at once. He wanted to take control of what he could. With the severance package from work, unemployment, and stimulus checks, he was able to get by but had to be careful.
He called and negotiated every single one of his bills and subscriptions and kept a fun, detailed habit tracker. The tracker was points-based and was a fun way to introduce structure during a very unstructured time.
Bankruptcy was already a consideration, and ultimately the route he decided to take. Even with the encouragement from Mike and his bankruptcy attorney, there was still some shame. It can feel like a failure. It’s important to show yourself forgiveness and grace. Shame gets lonely quickly and shields solutions.
Things started to turn around when Joel got a job offer. He had applied and interviewed for a lot of jobs when he was unemployed. Job 218 was finally the one.
When that happened, instead of being in survival mode, he and Mike started working on the goals. One of the big goals is adoption and the other was a trip to Disney for Joel’s 40th birthday. Mike never made him feel silly and encouraged all his goals. As a single person, having the outside encouragement of a Trainer is huge.
The Chapter 7 bankruptcy is done and finished. He’s already two years in with a ‘fair’ credit score.
Joel has retained an adoption attorney and successfully completed the home study process. The next step is creating his profile and meeting expecting mothers! It’s been an exciting thing to talk about with Mike. They had a few initial conversations about the cost of adoption and raising a child as a single parent. He did not let the sticker price deter the goals. Big goals have big numbers, and so Joel changed jobs which came with a pay increase.
Coming from a humble background financially, he couldn’t believe he was at the number he is at now. He is proud of himself for earning it every day.
In thinking about challenging times, it’s all about developing the toolbox for survival. Having a money team is amazing. It takes a village, and you don’t have to face your finances alone.
Your best is going to look different every day, but the goal is to always do your best.
Resources mentioned in the episode: The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz
Takeaway: My biggest takeaway is that everything you do financially is fixable. Every single wrong turn or misstep or poor choice is not something for you to be afraid or ashamed of because you haven’t done anything permanent to your financial health. Let’s leave the horror stories for the movies going forward.
Random Three Questions
If money wasn’t a factor, what would be your ideal job?
What is something you’ve binged during the pandemic?
If this was your last meal on earth, what would it be?
If you have any topics you would like me to cover on this podcast, or if you’d like to get in the financially naked hot seat, I encourage you to email me at Shannon@fingyms.com, or join the private Martinis and Your Money Facebook group, and let me know what you want to hear.
My biggest goal for The Financial Gym right now is to grow our Certified Financial Trainer Licensing Program. This program is built on over 10 years of working with tens of thousands of people to get them financially healthy. My goal is that every financial advisor, planner, or coach has our certification. Our approach to financial wellness is revolutionary and it’s important for me and my team that anyone who plans to work with people around their finances understands the important lessons we’ve learned along the way. I always say the problems are the same, the zeros are different. If you’re a personal finance nerd with a passion for helping others, this is the course for you. If you’re a financial professional helping others, this is the course for you. If you’re working with a financial professional, you should insist that they get this designation so that they can become more holistic in their financial planning. So head over or send friends to financialgym.com and under our services, you’ll find more on the certification program.